Mothers & Daughters




“It’s not an adventure until something goes wrong.” -Yvon Choinard

A few weekends ago, one of my best friends from high school, Gigi, and I made our way to New Jersey from Baltimore and Chicago, respectively, to celebrate the impending arrival of a baby girl to our other dear friend, Mel.  With our gifts carefully wrapped in stork-adorned paper and each of our mothers in tow, Gigi and I made our way to Mel's baby shower and feasted on penne and chicken and veal as we helped Mel open gifts and eat cannoli cake.

It was a beautiful day.  It could have ended there.

What would reasonable and responsible women in their 30's do? Kiss everyone goodbye and take our panda bear favors and mothers straight home.

What Gigi and I did -
"Aren't we near where Cafface is?"
"Yes! Let's go!" 

Can't you just hear the cacophony only mothers can utter?
"Where?"
"When? Right now?"
"Is it far?"
"What place?"
"Where are you taking us?"
"Now?"

And, can't you just hear Gigi and I?
"Cafface!  You know, Real Housewives of New Jersey?" 
followed by
famous last words - "I'm looking at the map. It says it's only five miles away.  ... Only five miles."

So, as Gigi drove, I read directions off of the map on my phone.

We then proceeded to drive through the scariest neighborhood in New Jersey, if not North America.

Can't you just hear the cacophony only mothers can utter?
"Do you know where we are?"
"Are the doors locked?"
"What is the map saying?"
"Should we get back on the highway?"
"If your father ever finds out where his car was!"

And can't you just hear Gigi and I?
Me: It says only three miles now. We'll get there.
My mother (under her breath): Hopefully.
Me: Ma!

Gigi: Oh, look, there are cops! See! We're safe.
Me: Yeah, we're safe.  See!
Me (seeing the police appear to be preoccupied): Though they look a little busy right now.

But, before forever, we finally entered a whole new world.  There were manicured lawns and shopping centers.
Our mothers started to breathe again.

And then, we got lost. I called Cafface and a friendly voice told me to turn around and, although they were closing, they'd keep the register open for us. Who could ever say New Jerseyans are unfriendly!

We finally made it. The store is a beauty bar indeed! It's a haven for makeup lovers and lovers of all things beautiful (they sell clothes too!).

And who loved it most of all? The two mothers who minutes ago wereshipping their pants and, now, were touching all the samples, asking questions, and advising their daughters that they didn't have their credit cards on them.  "I was going to a shower. What did I need a credit card for?"

What would reasonable and responsible women in their 30's, who just put their mothers through hell, do?  Treat their moms to lipsticks, eyeshadows and other treats.

And that's exactly what we did.