so much for high school sweet hearts.


I am now 19 going on 20, third year in college this fall. Since sophmore year of high school, I really wanted to have a boyfriend because i wanted to be walked to class and hold hands. But instead, I got a boyfriend that I ended up with for about three years plus one year of an on and off relationship. Everyone thought we were the cutest couple ever and for a while things were pretty and pink. But when i got into college out of town, I changed and i also grew up.  While i was trying to figure out my major and how to get through school, he followed me out of town to be with me which made me more stressed. This caused the on and off because i was unsure of what i really wanted and if i still felt the same way about him. It took four years to figure out that he was a loser and i was'nt loyal around the third year.


So about two months ago, we got in a big arguement and i finally decided to end this high school sweetheart story. Ever since i felt lonely, incomplete, and scared of the world in general. Despite those feelings, i felt it was for the best. It took about two months to realize that I can be on my own without him. I even have dreams, goals, and aspirations. I think that at my age being alone is the best, so that i have space to grow intellectually and spiritually. I feel like i'm alive now.


so four years ago i thought we were going to be high school sweet hearts and end up married in a shithole town. But now i'm glad i grew out of that stereotype relationship.  I still ended up being the fool because i  lost a lot: i lost my best friend (he was) and he owes me a lot of money ($300).

But on the bright side i experimented with my life and took risks. I hooked up with girls, dated older men,  and i'm even doing better in school. I guess i'm glad this happened to me sooner than later.